Actually, what is the best age to have a baby? Is there a ‘best’ age? Being an older Mum myself, not entirely by choice, I’m slightly biased in my opinion. I’m lucky enough to have travelled a lot and had a bit of disposable income. I had also found my man, got married and bought a home, all before thinking about starting a family.
I have to admit, its not occured to me to think of this from a Father’s point of view. So this post is mainly about the Female of the species!
I suppose we all have our ideal situation when we think about having children, or had dreams when we were children ourselves about what our lives would look like as Mums. My plans were definitely not to endure the physical and emotional strains of IVF that’s for sure. I’ll leave that there for another day! I suppose what I’m trying to say is, what is best?
Older Mum at 35
Biologically the younger you are the better your reproductive system will perform, the older you get the more problems you may run into? These are all questions really – I’m no expert! Having said that I know for a fact that once you reach that ripe old age of 35, the NHS labels you as an ‘older mum’ (I escaped that title by 56 days by the way) and will keep a closer eye on your pregnancy. The NHS say the best age to have a baby is between the age of 20 & 35.
Are exceptionally young Mum’s able to cope with raising a child when they are still children themselves, juggling education and life experience in general? This in itself is a very controversial topic! One that I don’t want to get drawn into. You might say that having children really early means you can grow up with them and enjoy your time once they have flown the nest, wrinkle free! You could say older Mums with a good career end up juggling work and kids so whats the difference. I think it all comes down to personal expectations and personal circumstances.
Bloody Brilliant Carefree Days
For me, having had a lot of life experience and being in a stable and financially sound situation made me able to cope far better. That’s compared to the 20 year old me, looking back. The 20 year old me was still working out what I wanted to do in life, who I wanted to be. I look back on those days as bloody brilliant carefree days where all I had to worry about was me. The cheating boyfriends, debt and continuous house hopping all made me who I am today and made me a stronger person in the process. Again, making it (for me) a much better place to be in to have a child of my own.
“The average age of mums and dads in England and Wales has increased by almost 4 years over the last 4 decades. At the birth of a child in 2015, fathers averaged 33.2 years of age and mothers 30.3 years. Falling birth rates among the under-30s and rising birth rates at older ages reflect trends evident since the mid-1970s to delay childbearing to later ages.”Office for National Statistics
In a recent survey over on my Facebook page, I asked the question: What age should you have kids? 67% people said younger – up to 30. 33% said older – over 30. This wasn’t an official poll. I think you would have to look into who answered the question. Are the 67% all younger Mums and in which case they are obviously going to choose what applies to them. The same would be said for the 33%. It does show though that it wasn’t even close, the majority voted for younger. I expected more of an even split if I’m honest with you.
It’s What Works Best For You
Since having a child and attending groups, watching other Mums, chatting in groups and my experiences, it is down to what works best for you. If having a child younger works for you then great, if having a child older works for you then great too! Would I have had William at a younger age given the choice? Yes probably but not by a lot. I think given the choice I would have had him bang on 30!
What are your thoughts on the topic? I’d love to know if you had kids younger and then had one a lot later, which time was better?
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